Sandwich stroke rehab failures

Sandwiches often have items dangling from them. They hang out of my mouth after I've taken a bite. So I either have to suck them up, thus spraying whatever sauces are on them onto my plate and lap. Or I set the sandwich down and clean my mouth with my good hand, hoping like hell I can pick that sandwich up again one-handed. Juicy Lucys are almost impossible to pick up again, I've had to resort to knife and fork which brands me as a barbarian.

Eg. fried onions, lettuce on burgers, Philly steak sandwiches are especially bad.

I need both functioning hands to appear in public, this is ruining my social life. Friends know enough to just point to the side of their mouth where I need to wipe. Dates are embarrassed.

Where are the protocols that will get me back a functioning left hand?  And 'All strokes are different, all stroke recoveries are different.' is not a valid answer. I would keel haul you for that useless spout of words.