Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Relaxation

There is none anymore. It is not possible for me to truly relax anymore. I can't sit in a chair or couch without checking to make sure my left arm is not in the way as I sit down. Then after sitting I have to determine if I want to try to flatten and wedge my fingers under a leg or just go for the easy route and hang the arm down the side, hoping to reduce my spasticity enough so it hangs straight.  Even just sitting in a car requires much thought, watching the scenery is interspersed with checking my arm and working on my hamstring, pulling my foot under me.
No wonder I am mentally fatigued each and every day and all day long. Probably why I love the social events I go to where drinking alcohol is involved. For short periods of time I can just talk and laugh. Although with one usable hand drinking and snacking are not doable at the same time.
Flying is even worse because I have to hold and make sure my left arm isn't intruding into my seatmate or the aisle due to the damnable spasticity.  I can no longer relax enough to fall asleep while flying.

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